Job *** Interview

Ok this post is meant to be informative. So I will keep the vulgarities at a bare minimum.

So you think you can teach?

Lets not kid ourselves. What exactly is "passion for teaching"? When people tell me they have a passion for teaching, my first impression is "he likes to be the smartest person in a group" or "he likes to 讲大道理 ". Do not get me wrong, there is absolutely nothing wrong with both mentalities. Everyone enjoys being the smartest in the group or having people listen to your 大道理.

So basically, if you wanna be a teacher, apply online, wait for reply, if shortlisted go down to *** for essay writing and interview and a 5 min verbal presentation on any topic of your choice.

Here are the essay questions that were given to me. ( 3 choose 1 )

1) What are your views on a teacher dating a student after he/she graduates and is of legal age?

2) What are your views on a teacher accepting expensive gifts from students?

3) Responsibility, Integrity, Respect bla bla bla, which of the above core values do you think is the most important and why?

Obviously being the humji dog that I am, I chose Q3.

And I am quite sure people who know me know what are my views on Q1 and Q2 hence understanding why I chose Q3 since I do want to get the job.

Next was the interview, 4 old people asking me a bunch of standard questions.

Pro tip: Do not say things like "I like to interact with kids" if you are a male. Just don't.

So why do you want to be a teacher?

What I wanted to say:
I dun. I dun even wanna work a single day of my life. I just wanna sit on my ass playing games with money dropping from the sky.

What I said:
"I feel that as a teacher, I play an instrumental role in molding the nation's future and I feel a great sense of achievement and satisfaction when I am able to inspire the next generation of students the way my teachers have inspired me in the past."

So what makes you think you can be a teacher?

What I want to say:
Because the students today are fked up. I am fked up. I understand them. Takes one to know one. You think your *** courses are enough to cover the amount of toxicity in the generation of students today? Lmao. Just ask the minister of education to go play 10 ranked games in LoL and I assure you he will revamp his useless policies and courses the very next day.

What I said:
"From young I have been known to be vocal and hence I want to work in an environment where I can interact and communicate with others while exchanging intellectual ideas. With my outgoing personality and my continual involvements with both music and sports, I believe I fit right into the ***'s policy of having a holistic education experience and hence be able to guide and inspire students to take the holistic path in education as well."

Edit: The entire segment above was just a joke. Everything on this blog is a joke. A great big joke. Now that I have the job, I love teaching and I am just trying really hard to be funny k? So dear *** background checker, I am just a humble teacher who tries too hard to be funny, please 大人有大量 and let me carry on trying to entertain myself without blacklisting me or firing me ok? Thanks in advice mighty ***<3

Edit 2: Replaced all traces of my boss name into ***. Save my own humji ass.